Private Prayer

Why we pray

Prayer is a very intimate act. In the book of Matthew, Christ has this to say about how we

should pray:

"But you, when you pray, go into your room, and when you have shut your door, pray to

your Father who is in the secret place; and your Father who sees in secret will reward you

openly." - Matthew 6:6

At first this seems incorrect, we were just in church today and prayed altogether in the

liturgy. Would it have been correct for us to rather stay at home? This is not the case, for prayer

is both a private and public act. What Christ is teaching us here is that we are not to make prayer

about ourselves - prayer is ultimately about God, and our union with Him. Public prayer is

appropriate when Christians gather together to worship God in unity, but if we are to pray by

ourselves, it is best to do so in a quiet and removed place.

Prayer is about relationship and communion. This is why we are called to pray every day

of our lives, and not just Sundays. If you look at the life of a parent who truly loves their child, or

a husband who truly loves his wife, there is a continual expression of love. This shows as a hug

or kiss before leaving home in the morning, a sharing of food at dinner, and a loving "good

night" before bedtime. It is to be the same with our relationship with God - a continual

expression of love and gratitude throughout our day.

The second aspect mentioned previously was communion - which means more than only

the Body and Blood of Christ which we receive during the liturgy. Communion is the result of

anything that brings us closer to God, which includes our prayers. We are like vessels, and true

prayer calms our senses and allows ourselves to empty out our baggage, which gives room for

God to enter into our hearts.

Examples of Prayer

King David was the third king of Israel, but after being forced out of power by his son

Absalom, he was forced to live in exile for a period of time. As a result of this, David wrote

many poems which have been recorded in the book of Psalms. These Psalms (along with Psalms

written by others) now form the basis of much of our prayer in the church.

There are many examples of Christ Himself praying in the Gospels. It may seem

confusing for God to be praying to Himself - but if we remember that God exists in trinity, and

that prayer is an act of communion, then it makes sense that Christ would pray to the Father.

According to Mark 5:16 "...He Himself often withdrew into the wilderness and prayed.",

showing the importance of humility and stillness in prayer.

St. Gregory Palamas was a 14th century monk who lived on Mount Athos, and defended

the practice of "hesychasm", which means stillness. Hesychasm is a method of contemplative

prayer which focuses on finding inward peace, and praying from the heart. The Jesus prayer has

become an integral part of hesychastic spirituality.

How Do We Pray?

In the Orthodox Christian tradition, we have been handed down many wonderful hymns

and prayers which are both useful for us to pray, and are also instructive for us on how we should

pray. Prayers are often combined into what is called a prayer rule - a set of prayers which we

pray consistently every day.

With prayer rules it can be easy to lose a personal touch and feel like you're simply

reciting words on a page. This is why it can be helpful to talk with your priest about what your

prayer rule is, they will be able to guide you. It is also important to pray in our own words - pray

for your friends and family, pray to God for thanksgiving, and pray to God for your needs.

Another important aspect of prayer is prayers for intercession. Just like you might ask

people at church or a friend you know to pray for you, so we also ask the Saints and the angels to

pray to God for us. As you begin to pray for the intercession of the Mother of God, of your

patron Saint, and any other Saint you are drawn to, you will begin to find a feeling of familiarity

and closeness to them. It is important for us to turn to the Saints in our private prayers so that

they might join us in prayer as well.

Beginning to Pray

The most important part about establishing a life of prayer is doing so by talking with

your spiritual father (priest). It is easy for us to jump in too deep and become discouraged when

we fail, and as such we need someone to guide us as we learn to pray. Talk to your spiritual

father about what prayers you should do before bed, or when you wake up in the morning.

The Jesus prayer ("Lord Jesus Christ, Son of God, have mercy on me, a sinner") is an

invaluable tool in our arsenal. Spiritual warfare is very real, and the Jesus prayer is one of the

best ways for us to pray continually, as St. Paul encouraged us to do. In conjunction with a

prayer rope, we pray the Jesus prayer to find that inner stillness and to keep the name of Christ in

our mind always.

Prayer is a daily battle, it is not always easy. But it is always worth it. When you begin to

establish a life of prayer, it will start to become a natural part of your life. Sometimes we might

miss our morning or evening prayers because we are busy or too tired - and you will feel the

difference when that happens. Prayer becomes your friend, and if you allow it to become part of

you, you will feel a hunger for more.